7.31.2009

On Twitter, Blogger, Weight Watchers and Self Esteem



I am not what most people would refer to as a "fragile" person.

Actually, many might even consider me arrogant, full of myself, or if they are trying to be nice - confident.

The thing of it is.... I'm not arrogant. No, I'm not really totally fragile, either, mind you, but I don't actually have the self confidence that I apparently exude. I can be broken and it isn't nearly as hard as I make it seem on the outside.

So, that being the case...Twitter and Blogger don't help! No...I know that's funny, but seriously...think about it....it's like freaking high school all over again!!! You have the 'popular' bloggers and the Tweeters that all 'hang out' (online, of course, seeing as they live all over the world) and the ones that go to the big conferences like the recent BlogHer event and the ones that have companies knocking down their headers just to get these people to mention them in a Tweet or a blog post. And yet....I am none of the above. CRAP! It's happening all over again! LOL! High School! And to think - I thought by the time I hit thirty it would all be behind me! HA!

So this is the thing....the other day I was chatting with someone that I work with very briefly on Twitter. If you are a Twitter user, you know that every conversation is totally public, but that's part of the fun...anyone can jump in! So, over the course of grand total of about six tweets back and forth I managed to INSTANTLY lose 2 followers. Okay...no biggie...obviously they can't handle the fact that someone might have a different opinion than they do and so they decided they don't like me simply because of that despite the fact that they liked me fine prior to that....hmmmm...that makes sense. LOL!

Now yes, this could have been sheer coincidence, but let's be honest, here...it's not likely in this particular case. Just trust me on this one.

Then there is the blog. I have that cute little followers widget over there on the right side of my blog because I absolutely LOVE to see the faces of those who read my blog! I get so excited with each and every comment and I just really enjoy the community that evolves around blogging. It's crazy wicked fun! The thing is...the other day....(just before the Twitter incident) I lost a small bunch of followers!

I was so sad!

Seriously! And these people, I know I didn't likely offend, seeing as I tend to avoid the offensive on my blog, just 'cause I like you guys and stuff. So they just left because they find me boring? Obnoxious? Unlikeable?

These are the things that went through my head.

OR...the reality of it is that Blogger tends to drop followers from time to time, as those of you with Blogger Blogs already know so well, and some people only follow for giveaway purposes and then unfollow after that because they just don't have time or aren't really interested in your subject matter.

All of the above are reasonable. So why the BLOODY HECK did it bug me so much to see that number go down? Maybe I am fragile.

And then....the BIG ONE. The GREAT BIG HIT to my self esteem happened on Wednesday night.

I am sure I have mentioned Weight Watchers before, no? Well, anyway, last summer I joined and I hit my goal weight after several months and I was THRILLED! I mean, I felt better, I looked great, and I felt SO GOOD about myself! So, I am a lifetime member of Weight Watchers and now I go in once a month to weigh in and prove that I am maintaining and it is all free as long as I stay within two pounds of my goal weight.

I didn't.

On Wednesday evening, for the very first time since I reached my goal weight I had to PAY!!!

I cried all the way home. LOL! I am so NOT even kidding you! I MUST be fragile! HA!

So how much was I over? 2.8 lbs.

Yes. I was over my goal by less than 3 lbs. And that managed to get to me THAT much! Seriously? WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME? As my husband kindly pointed out, one could easily lose that much simply by pooping. (LMAO! Sorry if that was too much info, but I really couldn't leave it out! LOL!)

But here is the thing....I'm fine about all of the above now. No, not because I've justified any of it, but rather because I realized that it REALLY DOESN'T MATTER!

Am I defined by my Twitter Follower Count? Ummm... let me think.....

Yeah, no.

Am I less of a person if I don't have a GAGILLION blog followers? Ummm.... let me think about that one, too......


Yeah, No.

Is it okay if my weight fluctuates just a bit here and there as long as I stay healthy and take care of my body?

YUP!

And I'm not alone...I know others have been saddened by the loss of a Twitter follower, blogger follower, or some other little insignificant thing, so this is why I am writing this post today.

FREE YOURSELF!

You are you! Not who any social media number or classification determines you to be! Not even who the number on the scale tries to tell you who you are....nope....you are just you.

There are far more important things in life to worry about. So I beg of you ... DON'T let those types of things even touch your self esteem. Be happy.

Please.

I am!!!

Oh...and I happened to see the number of people subscribed to my blog has gone up drastically, so even if you aren't public followers, I know you are out there, and for THAT I am thankful! LOL!

Oh, yeah....and I really am THAT AWESOME!

Just say'n.


32 comments:

  1. Love this post! If I could figure out how to use Twitter, I would totally follow you. Oh, and I tend to agree with your Hubs on the quickest way to lose 3 lbs!

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  2. Well, Jingle, I agree with you. Seems like the blog world and Facebook for that matter can be JUST like HS. I have often thought of closing out my FB because it is the "same" people getting all the attention. I don't care so much about my blog. I do get bothered by the fact that the blogs I read, everyone is so happy ALL the time, life is good, they live in big beautiful houses and here is little old me. I am a SAHM,we struggle financially, we are bursting at the seems in our house, I struggle with depression, I live forever away from my family. And, I put it all out there, then, I feel silly for doing that. But, life isn't always a "bowl of cherries". Mainly, my blog is for my family to watch my children grow since they can't see them every day. But, I just feel like, dang, wish I could be all happy and stuff all the time. :O)

    I completely enjoy your blog, I think you have to be a total "HOOT" in real life. You are such a delight to read. I enjoy all of your crafty goodness that you post, love seeing your scrap room all messy!

    Well, what I think I may be trying to say is, we are too hard on ourselves. I am on myself. I always want the best of everything and want to do my best.

    Anyways, you have lots of followers and bloggie friends that love you, even if you don't have swiffer or the ferminator knocking at you door. I would much rather just see you, your life and all your fun creations.

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  3. You ARE awesome and thanks for the gut check this morning! Man, it used to be about who wasn't friends with who in high school, now you can get rejected by multiple forms of social media within seconds of each other. Our kids will have it soooo tough, won't they?! Great message here, Jingle! :) Glad I "met" ya on 2Peas!

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  4. Oh that's funny yet very true.

    Tania (via SITS)
    PS. I hope you managed to poop the 2.8lbs.

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  5. OH but look at your Technorati thingy! Way more than my single "1"

    Ugh. I'm sad. And lonely.

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  6. LOL I've gotten to the point where I don't really care how many followers I've got! It's kind of nice. :) Thanks for stopping by my blog!

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  7. Great Post!! I used to get a little upset every time I got a message that someone Unsubscribed from my Feed. But I have gotten much better, now I barely bat an eye if I see that message.
    I didn't know Weight Watchers makes you pay if you go over 2 pounds of your weight loss goal. That seems a little sad, LOL! Like, oh guess what? You gained too much weight & now you have to PAY us....lol. But I wouldn't let that bother you, your weight fluctuates a lot over the days & that is such a small amount to be over.
    And I totally know what you mean about High School & clicks with bloggers. I'm not in any of them...maybe that's a good thing :)

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  8. I agree with you about this 100%. Social networking makes me feel like I am back in HS again. I HATED HS! So much that I dropped out. I won't let them get me down though, I will keep on blogging and tweeting no matter if I have any followers or not. As far as fb, most of my "friends" are from HS, so I talk to the ones I like and those I don't get ZERO of my time. If they have something negative to say I just block them. Why didn't we have that ability in HS? Would have made my life so much easier!

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  9. Very cool and very true post!I wish I didn't let the blogger thing bother me, but I do... although I don't care too much about twitter. (I say too much, because I do care a little, of course!)

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  10. you are AWESOME, don't worry 'bout that stuff.

    when I start to feel down about the lack of comments on my blog, I remind myself this is journaling for me. And I know my irl friends and family read it...and that is why I even started it.

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  11. Well, I have a whole 20 followers, so I guess I'm really unpopular! LOL! And, I never even made my goal weight at WW... things just got in the way. Oh well... such is life. I've got bigger fish to fry! ;) {{{hugs}}}

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  12. You are so funny! You have about 100 followers more than I do, and to me that means you are a big blog!! This type of thing used to bother me, but I don't have time for that stuff anymore...it is what it is!! You are so sweet and bubbly it is always fun to visit...I missed you on VTT by the way!!

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  13. I have been waiting to read this post since you mentioned it was coming up. It is all so true! And I will admit I let the Facebook and follower thing get to me too much. You are right...it is all very high school, but I can't help it. Yet. I am working on it. I just love the feeling that people actually want to read what I write. Just one of my weird hang-ups. I will re-read your post here whenever I need a reality check!

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  14. Well I still like you :) {{{hugs}}}

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  15. I WISH everyone that I followed did likewise, but as you said I must bore the heck out of them. It is very HS sometimes. But I just keep reminding myself that I blog for myself, for my son & my family. If anyone else joins in great, the more the merrier.

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  16. Oh Jen..Have we not all been there! Ya my BF says I'm nutz! But then I get over it...I think its a hormonal defect...LOL
    I follow your blog because you are so funny and uplifting, just stopping by brightens my day! If I tweeted, Id follow ya there too. And I absolutely agree with Sean..First thing that popped in my head was ...Did she poop that day? LOL

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  17. THis whole industry is soooo catty girl You have to just take it in stride. IT can beatttt you down if you let it! TRUST ME. I have let it before and got soooo down about it. I have been so hard on myself and just lost my will to scrap because of it. I lost my confidence and my mo jo. You have to just ignore the haters. THERE WILL BE HATERS EVERYWHERE IN EVER ASPECT OF LIFE. EVERYWHERE YOU GO. IN EVERY INDUSTRY. Its the natural balance of life someone is gonna want what you have. There are just some people in this world that are mean. sad to say so but it is true.
    I dunno about the blog following and the twitter following. I get some weird followers at times that I have noooo clue how they find me. (or why they want to even) I get people unfollowing me all the time but I figure why did they want to follow me in the first place roflmbo but that is just me I dont feel im that interesting in the first place rofl.

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  18. You are right! Not fragile dear! Not at all.

    I think you are one of the most engaging and buoyant bloggers that I follow.

    I follow you because I enjoy what you have to say and how you say it! And will continue to do so unless you beat me out to a Rock My Friday gift card! ;P

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  19. It is silly to let the little things bother you but we all do it. Thanks for the reminder that we need to get over ourselves:-)

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  20. This is hilarious b/c I am the same way! I don't twitter, but I get upset if I lose a follower on my blog.

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  21. I think a lot of dropped blogs, mailing lists, etc, especially in the summer time, is just people trying to simplify their messy crowded lives. Like sorting a sock drawer, but online :]. Nothing to take personally. Free time fluctuates.

    I am about 10 lbs over my target weight, so that is always nagging on me...
    Thanks for the honest, colorful post ;]. I am glad you put things into perspective and you're feeling better!

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  22. so very true.. you know those people in high school, most of them are in the "real world" now too! I keep telling myself that!

    Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

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  23. Jingle, that is too freakin' funny! I picked up a new follower today and was totally geeked for like, an hour, at least!

    AND -- you're totally right about Twitter. It's so high school all over again.

    So glad I swung by from SITS today! Happy SITS-S-S!

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  24. There are so many new ways to be rejected any more!! Rejection and judgement are around every corner.

    I have to just enjoy my blog for what it means to me and not get wrapped in stats and followers. I'm glad Typepad doesn't send followers notices like Blogger does. That way, I don't think about it too much.

    Karla

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  25. Really good post! I know the feelings you've had. It seems silly, but then it isn't. We all want to be 'liked'. And for the 'happy happy' blogs? We all know that people struggle through life. I don't write a lot of the 'downs' because I want to be 'up'! lol
    Have a wonderful day and screw the rest of 'em! lol

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  26. good post :)
    I LOVE getting comments on my blog but don't get too many!
    I have been bad this Summer with my goal of losing weight..hope to get back on track.
    I enjoy reading your blog :)
    your friend from down South!
    Deborah

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  27. Fabulous post! I, like you, love followers and comments. I am not a fragile person either, but I am sad when people unfollow me.

    I know how you feel about Weight Watchers. I am a lifetime member and am now many many pounds over my goal weight.

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  28. Ok, what you need to be is totally oblivious, like me! Also remember that it's all relative - you have 274 followers, I have 72! And I thought I was doing pretty well, lol!

    Thanks for the comment on my blog - I hope you come back to visit me. :)

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  29. oh girl you had me in tears near the end..or rather, your husband did. I totally did not see that coming...LOL.

    I think you and I are a lot alike in the whole sensitivity thing. I check my email mulitple times a day to see if I got ANY replies on my blog. More than 3 is a HUGE day for me, although 0 seems to be my average. lol.

    For a long time I was reaching for the moon with zero recognition, it really wears you down after a while. I finally gave up on every magazine contest and stopped submitting for pubs. I was tired of being disappointed and feeling like I suck at this hobby of ours. It is a hobby and it needs to be fun again!

    and just so you know, I would click that follow me button til I am blue in the...fingers...just to boost your mood a little! At this point I consider you a wonderful online friend. Kudos to you for being who you are! Fragile or not.

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  30. I completely get what you mean. I'm not one of the in-crowd bloggers (and never have been in the in-crowd at any time in my life), but I guess I'm used to it now, and I like being unique.

    I think Blogger does indeed drop followers from time to time, as I've noticed chunks of my followers drop off, even after not posting something possibly controversial.

    As for Twitter, I'm embarrassed to say I don't use it too much, except for publicizing giveaways. It is sometimes just too addictive, and I barely get online anymore anyway.

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  31. I have to confess to getting really down whenever someone unsubscribes from my blog, and wondering what did it, but that kind of thing has gotten less important over time.

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  32. Because I like the irony of it I've given you an award for this post.

    http://largerfamilylife.blogspot.com/2009/08/fabulous-dahlink.html

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